The Neighbourhood - How
I haven’t done a single constructive thing in the last few weeks. This bothers me.
It’s not for lack of trying but then simultaneously, it is. I feel as if I’m constantly trying to break a barrier, the one holding me back on the useless side of being, when all I want is to break free and step back into my creative and constructive zone.
Not that I ever was particularly disciplined but I had goals and I had focus and when I wanted something, I would make it happen. Nowadays, I just do nothing. But I want to do so many things instead of nothing.
I think a part of it is due to the fact that six weeks after moving, I still have half a dozen boxes still piled in the middle of my room. I’m the type to unpack and nest right away, and not having my a place to store my books, in plain view, is really bugging me. I feel like I can’t organise my life and thoughts and objectives so long as I have this mess staring at me every day. I can’t be without my books in order and I can’t stand not being able to see them.
I finally bought a bookcase and it’ll arrive on Sunday. I hope I manage to assemble it within a day because I’m so over this perpetually unsettled feeling.